Ever read an article about a health issue and think wow that sounds like so-and-so, and then you visit your health care provider and they diagnose you with that thing that you thought applied to everyone but you?
I'll just assume yes for the moment. And say: Me too.
So was a pretty major happy point of last week. (Other than my husband having a marvelous and inspirational time at a conference and making it home safely.)
Because there is comfort in having someone look you in the eye and tell you that you aren't crazy for your blood pressure spiking when your all your children talk in the same house, in the same room, at the same time. And there is comfort in friends checking up on you because you finally admit out loud that you are stressed and need to say no because you are just tired of being a monster. And there is comfort in being held.
There is comfort in a professional writer telling me that I am a writer so act like it. And there is comfort in another professional mom writer telling me it's ok to cry because motherhood is like negotiating with tiny terrorists, only harder.
There is comfort in the surrender.When I tell God the honest truth that I am looking for the minimum. How much do I need to read, pray, write, sing to Him to just make everything ok? Twenty minutes before I start the day? A quick prayer before the I want's and I need's swallow my energy and patience?
Ok. That is all I am looking for. But that is not what God offers. He offers joy. Joy to the full. So a few mornings ago, I planned to climb the verses in the Psalms rung by rung out of my pit of exhaustion and I made it three verses before I saw Psalm 5:3.
O Lord, in the morning I prepare a sacrifice for you and watch.
About that time Pandora started playing one of my new most favoritest songs by Rend Collective:
All that I am for all that You Are, my Lord.
All that I have for all that You Are.
You're the pearl beyond price, greater than life.
All that I am for all that You Are.
Each morning is a surrender. Sacrifice it all. The fatigue. The plans. Give it all to the Lord- my Lord. Your Lord.
And then He does just the most amazing thing. He gives us Himself.
"Watch this," He says. And He takes the tired. He takes the schedules. Plans. Words. He infuses them with His Spirit, His love. He transforms it with His presence. He gives peacecomfortjoy without measure. He does what we would do for our own children whenever possible. What love. What treasure. Because He treasures us. He treasures you.
Lord,
Surrender
our ears to Your voice
our eyes to Your presence
our hands to Your work
our mouths to Your praise
our feet to Your will
our minds to Your wisdom
our hearts to Your love.
Happy, joy-full week to you all!
"And then He does just the most amazing thing. He gives us Himself." So much Amen! And once again He has revealed that to me as I surrendered my writing to Him. He really does the most amazing things!
ReplyDeleteI so love being able to come here again and read your words, Lauren. I really, really hope one day we will have a chance to catch up in person again. Love you so much. xoxo