#NotMyEnemy

There is an epidemic of fear, hate, and bitterness running rampant on our globe right now. And for some reason we were momentarily lulled into the lie that America was immune.

I think it is safe to say we have had our wake up call.

And as my heart breaks over the strife and the pain, I have to shout it out: This is not the way.

This is not the end. It is not the end of our story.

It is the middle. The part where the characters try to make things right. And in the most intriguing stories I've read, usually the characters get it wrong a few times.

So I'm wondering this: since as Christians we live in the full knowledge that this is not the end of our story, are we willing to extend grace to the characters around us who mess things up? Or even admit that we could be messing up too?

Are we able to discern between those who are maliciously attempting to destroy lives, and those who simply think differently?

Are we willing to give them the benefit of the doubt that maybe, just maybe, those who disagree with us aren't the villains trying to destroy the world? Maybe we even have a bit of villainy in ourselves as well?

Maybe our battle is truly not against flesh and blood, "but against evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world, against mighty powers in this dark world, and against evil spirits in the heavenly places." (Eph. 6:12)

If my battle is not against a person, but against the powers of hell, then in all of my dealings with that person I must take one course of action every. single. time.

I must pray. I must pray for them. I may even need to pray with them.

I must look into the face of the people I believe are committing the vilest crimes against humanity and I absolutely must pray for them. Jesus told me to. Jesus prayed for me.


And when I just can't take it and I want to scream at those I see as my enemies, I have to remember that at one time I was an enemy of God. What did God choose to do with me at that time? Pursue me. Send His only Son to die for me. In His love and mercy and justice, He punished my sin on His Son. On His Son. And while it is completely contradictory to my sinful nature (COMPLETELY), He calls me to pick up my cross and do the same, to sacrifice the time He has given me on His altar. To offer up myself, indignation and all, and use His time to pray for His creatures, the very people He chose to create. The very ones He died for.


I don't want to do this. I have to. Not simply because God says so, but because there will always be another battle to fight- another person with whom I strongly disagree. Another person to rouse my "righteous" indignation. And if I allow myself to give in to the lie that these are my battles to fight alone, I will be embittered and angry forever- incapable of living in the thankfulness and joy to which God also implores me. I will have forgotten that God is God and I am not, and I will place myself in the judgment seat when I actually stand just as condemned as the person I am attacking.

I must view my neighbor through the lens of God in Christ Jesus. That is my only hope for peace and wisdom. The moment I forsake those lenses for my own fallen ones is the moment I bow to hopelessness and judgmental actions. Instead, I am called to bow before God alone. To utter "Thy will be done," and keep on living like the King is still on His throne. A heart that submits to the Lord is a heart that has hope even when they are in broken relationships at a broken time.  



So what should I do? Take action- but take it in the calm confidence of grace. Stand against injustice. Speak up for those who have no voice. Love my neighbor as myself. And realize that fighting hate with hate is pointless. As a mom who listened to "He started it, she started it," more times than I can count this morning, I do have to say hateful retaliation solves nothing. (Though I did congratulate them on cooperating with each other to drive me crazy.)



We have these words on our wall and I believe they rest there for such a time as this: "Darkness cannot drive out darkness. Only light can do that."- Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

We can only be lights in the darkness if we choose to answer temporal trials with the certainty of eternity. 

My words will only matter if I speak truth with the absolute assurance that my words are not coming from a heart smoldering with hatred, but from a heart burning with love for the victims and the criminals.

I can only do that if I first remember where I came from, where I stand with God because of Christ. 

And I must remember that true and lasting reconciliation comes only from God. No amount of organizing, and posting, and protesting can accomplish the work of changing hearts. That belongs to God. Which means that while I am responsible for my actions, I am not responsible for the results.

Seek justice, love mercy, walk humbly with your God. (Micah 6:8) May I be given the strength to live this way no matter what the future holds.

Life Dismantled, Life Content

"LOL I'd love to," I texted her. "How about when I am done doing all the other things I am supposed to be doing to make my life better? If I add one more healthy practice to my life I may quite literally fall apart."

My Sister-Friend had a great idea to do a healthy regimen together that would hopefully help us feel better with our kaleidoscope of illnesses. A great idea, really. And if I didn't feel like I was a Lego mom carrying various and sundry tasks all designed to improve the quality of the lives around me, maybe I would have been up for it. But one more thing to remember, and my head could pop right off my plastic shoulders. One more thing to carry and I'd be the Venus de Milo of motherhood.

I'd like to blame it on New Year's optimism- this draw toward anything that will make us feel successful and satisfied. Maybe this year I will follow through on my Bible reading/diet/exercise/ business/schooling/etc... and then I will be happy. But I have known that feeling at other random times as well, and this journey I am on can feel like wandering in circles around the desert wilderness. I just can't quite make it to the promised land.

So maybe you have felt this way, too. Like you know you should be satisfied, but it's just beyond your fingertips. And that maybe when you accomplish this, you can take a break and be content.

Here's the thing: it's not going to happen. Not for any meaningful length of time at least. Not with that perspective.

That aching we have to be enough- that is a God-shaped, God-shaping chasm in our lives that He daily and persistently fills. And He doesn't need us shoveling whatever self-help tricks and tips the world gives us into the place only He should occupy.

If you want to believe you can achieve great things because you are awesome- go for it. You are awesome and gifted. Many impressive things have been accomplished that way. Mega-businesses, mind-boggling inventions, huge political platforms have been built on this mentality. And they have done some good along the way.


But if you want your life to contribute to something that will last long after this world perishes; if you want it to have a purpose beyond the paycheck, then Jesus gives us one answer: Take up your cross and follow Him.

God is not in the business of making us a better version of who we think we should be. Like we have any clue who we should be. Dear God, thank you for not fulfilling my 16-year-old-self's vision of who I thought I should be.

He is in the business of resurrecting a child dead in their trespasses.

When I feel like God is dismantling my life, I have to bow to the One who I know is acting in love toward me. Because God never acts outside His love for us. Ne-ver. And if He is demolishing what I keep trying to rebuild, then I need to just sit down and let Him do His work because He is working from different (and infinitely better) blueprints.


God's plans may not contain what we determine to be glamorous in the moment, but that doesn't mean He isn't working out something beautiful and amazing and one-of-a-kind.


So if you have to mop floors? Go get it.
You have to wipe poopy butts? You rock it.
You have to pay bills? Own it.
You have to put yourself out there? You got this.
You have to be nice to people who cause naughty words to come to mind? Smile like a boss.


Whatever you do- "work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men." (Col. 3:23) It is unbelievable how much more satisfying life is when we remember who God is instead of trying to invent who we are. And when we try new endeavors from the starting point of confidence in Christ rather than ourselves? That's where progress is celebrated and setbacks are just that, setbacks; not foundation-shaking catastrophes.


We can try new things. We can learn and grow and take risks in the security that God is with us and equipping us for work that is beyond all we can imagine. We can be satisfied even as we struggle.


In a world that thrives on people's lack of satisfaction, cultivates it even, we have the promise that contentment can happen here because our God gives it abundantly. We can stop clasping our hands around our things and our plans, and open them to receive His gifts. He has given us His Son. He knows the desires of our hearts. He is with us. Isn't that the best starting point for anything we try to do?


"Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be satisfied." (Matt 5:6)

That is my 2017 prayer for us. May we seek God's righteousness first and be blessed with the satisfaction that looks at the good, bad, stinky, annoying, frustrating, feeble, failing, ugly, beautiful around us and says, "I have learned in whatever situation I'm in to be content." (Phil 4:11)


With love.

Seeing Beyond Me

Finding Dory made me feel, deeply. Triumph, loss, joy, love. And discomfort.




Ok, not the whole time. Just some of the time. I won't spoil the movie for all the poor unfortunates who haven't seen it yet, but my GOODNESS. She would get so close to finding her parents, and SLAM. Another obstacle! Another stinking obstacle! I assume the creators wanted to make Dory seem even that much more amazing because when the chips were way down on the ocean floor, and all seemed hopeless even to me ("Remember, Lauren. It's a movie. It's a Disney movie for crying out loud. It will work out. It will. But HOW?") Dory never gave up hope. Yeah, it worked.




That wasn't the uncomfortable thing for me though. Well not the only uncomfortable thing.




One of the characters is near sighted. Like me. And when the picture entered her point of view and all was fuzzy and Dory was a "little blue blob" a part of me felt a hint of panic. I could be the only one of thousands of near sighted people who felt that way, but it is a bit unnerving to be confronted with a very real handicap that you have "corrected" in a moment when you least expect it. Now was it
funny? Yes. Did it give me a good way to explain my own limitations to my family? You bet. So bravo Disney/Pixar. You brought forth the really unnerving question:




Is the near-sightedness limited to my physical body?




Um, no.




It creeps deep into my consciousness.




"No one cares what you think."
"You have nothing new to say."
"You don't know what you are talking about."
"Who wants to read one person's opinion?"
"You should be spending your time on something else."
"You are wasting people's time."
"Don't bother investing the time when you will probably just fail anyway."




Gross. It makes me cry just typing those things out loud.




Compound on that the guilty feeling that the problem is my lack of faith, and I am broken.




I have no tidy answer.




I have only the faint echo in this canyon that sounds:


Give thanks in all circumstances.


If faith required seeing, it wouldn't be faith.


If faith required a "feeling" it wouldn't be faith.


Faith is a verb. Faith is trust.


Faith is action even when you don't feel what you think you should feel.


Faith is acting on what you know is right even when it is plain old scary.


Don't underestimate what God can do. Don't sell Him short.


Just take one more step.




Maybe you aren't near-sighted. Maybe you see this world and God's plan 20-20.


Or maybe you see the obstacles and they are so much nearer and clearer than all the fuzziness in the future and you just want to circle your tank in safety.




I really don't think you were made for captivity. None of us were. We are free in Christ and if the Son sets us free we are truly free.




And we can take our eyes off ourselves and focus them on the Savior. It takes practice and I am just relearning. Thank God He is patient and straight-up relentless.




God grant us the courage to trust in You, make the next move, and just keep swimming.

#GodRemembers

"Mom, we forgot to do the Advent calendar."

You'd think her accusation wouldn't catch me off guard any more. I mean, we forget a lot of things. Practically every day.

And yet, those two words "we forgot" prickled something inside me.

Of course I answered rationally, "No, Honey. We didn't forget. We didn't have time yesterday, remember? We had church all night." With that the matter was settled. Right. We didn't have time. It's not that we forgot. It's just that in the 30 minutes we had between school and church we chose to eat snacks and watch a show on PBS. 

Why does the word "forget" sting me so? This morning's observation didn't wound me nearly as much as usual. Such as when I perform my weekly grocery shopping and the kids keenly observe that, "Mom, you forgot the bananas."

You forgot the quarters for Popcorn Friday.
You forgot to wash my shirt.
You forgot to pack my shoes.
You forgot to return the library books.
You forgot to pick up stamps.
You forgot to make the appointment.

You forgot... you forgot... you forgot.

A simple remark becomes a glaring accusation.

#momfail

And we can debate whether I should make more detailed lists, become more organized, or make my kids responsible for all the minutia in their own lives, but the truth is that when I take ownership of a task and fail to meet that responsibility, then I become immediately and poignantly aware of my own shortcomings.

What better time to face my own failing humanity than a season when we focus so pointedly on God's invading divinity?

Because as I continue to spew my tired, irrational rants that "Of COURSE I forgot! I'm busy remembering things for everyone around me," I look at the unsatisfying parts of my life and make my own accusation. God, you forgot. I simultaneously celebrate God and criticize Him.

Blinding tinsel and blaring Christmas ballads are only the tip of the marketing iceberg that breeds discontent in December.Constantly there is the pedaling of the lie that what you have is not enough. That who you are is not enough. And when enough is not enough, you admit that God is not enough. With every complaint we point the finger at God and remind Him, "God, you forgot."

Which is why we need to celebrate the season all the more. Sing God's greatness all the louder.

Because at the heart of the Christmas
message is this, "God has not forgotten you."

The evidence is there, wrapped in skin. For those who waited long for a Savior, who looked to God, just as we have, and asked Him desperately, "God, have you forgotten me, "a baby's cry proclaims, resounding, "Can a woman forget her nursing child, that she should have no compassion on the son from her womb? Even these may forget, yet I will not forget you." (Isaiah 49:15)

I will tell you a phrase that I hear far less often, yet when I hear it my heart aches with the pain of full love: Mom, you remembered...

That is gratitude at its simplest. Acknowledging that the caregiver remembered, was faithful.

Those who celebrate Christmas fully are the one who realize gratitude is the manger that cradles the God who remembers. Gratitude is the song of the angels, the urgency of the shepherds, the gifts of the wise men.

Gratitude utters to the broken, "Look at God. See how He remembers us."

Gratitude sees into the family discord and reminds us that Christ was born into discord, and in the darkness of it all God did not forget us, but sent His one and only Light because He loves us.

Gratitude heeds the voice that invites, "Come, everyone who thirsts, come to the waters; and he who has no money, come, buy and eat!" because the Holy One of Israel has not forgotten His covenant with us.

Gratitude is the cure of spiritual amnesia along with all its discontented side effects. It is the song, simple and constant, that sings, "God, you remembered".

Maybe you need to hear the song, remember deeply that God has not forgotten you. Maybe the grinches, bah-humbugs, and hopeless cases around you need to hear it. Chances are it needs to be heard by all of the above.

So as we await our coming King, our God who remembers, let's sing the song together in the hearing of our neighbors. We celebrate a God who has not forgotten us. A God who remembers us always. The only God who can fully satisfy. And for that we are eternally grateful.

Dethroning Your Fear {Three Word Wednesday}

It is often said that people and animals respond to a threat in one of two ways.

Fight or Flight.

Then there's fear.

Fight or Flight- that's all survival there. Survival instinct. It is something that works beyond fear. In spite of it.

Fear works a lot like stress. Its result- paralysis.

Months back, I chose a word for this year. I prayed, sought, studied. "Fearless" commanded all other words silence, and refused to relinquish its hold on my psyche. So I chose it, and was soon warned that choosing that word could mean God would mess with me in that area. The prophecy was true and I can tell you that I have suffered more at the hand of fear this year than I can ever remember before.

That being said, I can hardly remember what I ate for breakfast, so my memory is not the most reliable gauge of my overall emotional health.

Still, the tunnel seems to be coming to an end- the light approaching ever brighter.

I can move and breathe again.

Too long have I been locked in an upper room for fear of... whatever. Name it.

I put on a good show. Muddle through in spite of the crippling thoughts that threaten to undo me. There is a lot to fear in this world, and all sorts of them have been seeking the throne in my heart reserved for God.

Not gonna lie, they have budged themselves on there more than once.

I'm not using the "respect" definition of fear. I'm talking idolatrous fear.
Because having no other gods isn't always about loving something more than God. Oftentimes, it's about ascribing more power to things other than God. Like all those things we fear.

And don't think for a second that you have to wait until you are completely immobilized by fear before it is a problem. No phobia diagnosis necessary. The moment it robs you of peace in the Lord, the moment it plants the seed of doubt, that's when it is a problem.

If we think too quickly about it all, we may try to find some way to justify our fear. I'm a mom, I'm supposed to worry. (Lie.) We are tempted to give fear credit for the fact that we are mobilized to take the reins and act in our communities. Or read our Bibles. Like those fears are driving us to our knees before the Lord.

Only fear does not do that. Ever. Survival- that's different. Love. Mercy. Grace. Those gifts from God are alone what send us searching for His peace.

Fear locks us away. It is a cunning bully that gradually shoves us in with the crowd that believed in Jesus, but were too scared to confess it because of what others might do. It leaves us helpless, frozen on an ocean in a squall.

It deafens us to Jesus' words:

"It is I; do not be afraid." (John 6:20)

It robs us of the gifts that are rightfully ours as heirs to the kingdom of God:

"Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives so I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid." (John 14:27)

And God knows that. It is recorded in history as one of the first emotions felt by our first mother and father after the Fall. He knew way back when, before Creation, that we would need a Savior. And that we would need a Helper. And He delivered. Just like God always does.

God may give us more than our feeble selves can handle, but His promise of salvation and a Helper are guarantees that offer real hope. Because there is nothing He cannot handle. Nothing.

Drop-kick our fear and deliver us every day, Lord.

-----------

Linking up today with simply wonderful Simply Beth for Three Word Wednesday!

Marigolds and Miracles {What to do When This Mess of World Steals Your Peace}

The husband is back! Safe. Sound. Here. Praise the Lord.

In his absence, my parents ventured north to help me around the home. Thank you thank you thank you...

My parents each have a specific set of skills and I know that. So I made lists. Mom and I went grocery shopping, and she assumed the role of "Laundry Fairy." My dad's list consisted of fix-it type stuff that needed to be done that we just never get around to doing. That and gardening.

"You still have a rabbit?" His question referred to the rabbit residing in our backyard our first year here. The animal was huge and destructive. And impossible to intimidate. It was because of this rabbit that I started planting marigolds. Even after the rabbit disappeared marigolds have kept their vigil and rabbits have kept away from my garden.

This past weekend, as I put my garden in the ground, sowing seeds and plants into the black earth, the marigolds stood small sentries.

Then I thought of my children.

Little sprouts growing, bearing fruit.

It is enough to scare the daylights out of me. Because I'm not guarding them against ravenous rabbits, but a lion seeking someone to devour.

And Christ's admonition falls heavy on my shoulders, "Let the little children come to me and do not hinder them..."

If Christ was talking about simple Sunday school and church, I could rest easy. Check and check. Enroll them in VBS... Check. After-school church programs... Check.

But something tells me that Christ is talking the walk. 

And I am easily convinced that if anyone is hindering their walk with Christ, it's me.

Casting stones and careless words. Is that really giving my children Jesus?

Not to mention a world ravaged by wars, strife, struggle. Abroad. Domestic. Human beings are capable of such atrocities and I am one and the same. What can my feeble efforts do to stop the world from breaking my young ones to bits?

I drown in thoughts, reaching toward scriptures until I surface. I am buoyed by one in particular:

Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.

Philippians 4:8

At one time I hastened through this verse, summarizing "just think about the happy things," as though pixie dust and happy thoughts would carry me over cares.

But that's not what it says. Focus on what is true. I list the truths, deliberately. The Truth illuminates the dark dread. The Beauty of Christ is the antidote to the fear poison.

I can worry myself sick. Fears consume in ways no "happy thoughts" can battle. But when I focus on what is true, just, pure, lovely, commendable... I am reminded of God. Of His love, power, mercy, providence. It has never depended on me. That was never the point. All along I was only to plant the marigolds and trust the Maker. 

Relief. Release.

Plant marigolds. Build fences. Resist the fear that would compel us to smother our sprouts "for their own protection." 

Instead, trust the Only One who has overcome the world. The One who began this good work in us in the first place, and Who promises to bring it to completion. 

Where His truth reigns, there reigns peace. Where His wisdom prevails, there prevails peace. Where His peace permeates, the world cannot overcome.

And it is in His peace that the big kids and little children of the world encounter Christ.

But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruits, impartial and sincere.

James 3:17

Because We All Get Knocked Down {Messy Monday}

April is soccer month here. I say it is soccer month because the season is literally contained in the month of April, with two nights a week dedicated to games.

My husband and I are soccer players. We were at least. We still try, and will continue to try until our kids are old enough to school us. Which, in my case, could be any day now. We are also coaches.

I coach the U6 boys team on which my son plays. Three years into it and I have a basic idea of how the season will begin, as well as a general idea of how it should end. So, when we got into practice the other day, I realized that the best way to keep the boys' attention was to have them learn as we played a game. 7 v. 1. I might not be all that I once was, but I can still take 7 kindergartners and preschoolers.

My fancy footwork got me through some tight spaces. 7-ish (some boys get distracted) pairs of feet chased and kicked around me. I saw an opening and struck the ball toward the space, just to clear it out of the mob.

I struck it right into a kindergarten face.

Right into it. Lit. Him. Up. It was like in one of those comedies where some kid is the victim of an adult's irresponsibility. Feet in the air, the poor kid flew.

The horrified mommy inside me gasped! I yelled his name. "Are you ok?!"

"Uh-huh." He nodded his head and was up like a rocket, on his feet chasing the ball.

I was obviously more damaged by the incident than he was. I asked his mom later if she happened to see her son take it in the face. "Yeah." She shrugged it off. Apparently he bounces back from injury quite easily.

So I have a new hero. He'll be six years old this summer.

There are times to fall prostrate, broken before the Lord.

Then there are times to jump to our feet and get back into the game.

I'll be honest. I make my injuries out to be a pretty big deal. Someone "offends" me and it really just tears me up. And when I should get on with life, I choose to sit in the grass and cry. Maybe not actual tears, maybe just words. Maybe just "venting." Yeah, more often I choose to "vent" about the problem than pray to the Only One who can actually solve it.

I didn't hear another word from his mouth about the shot. Does he remember it? I don't know. Maybe. But when something more important comes along, like helping your teammates to victory, injuries are just part of the game and nothing more.

I'm fairly certain this Monday we will encounter a blow of some sort to our egos. It's pretty much guaranteed. So I pray God turns our focus to what is really important, and gives us the legs to hop back into the game!

My soul finds rest in God alone; my salvation comes from him.

He alone is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress, I will never be shaken.

Psalm 62:1-2

We're All Puzzled

We are having a garage sale.

This is the first one I have attempted in a while. I'm talking about 9 years. I think we did one with the church right after we got married to fund a youth group mission trip. Pretty sure that was the last time.

It's just a daunting task.

So these past years I've collected our treasures and given them away or donated them somewhere. Simply because I don't want to do the pricing thing., and because other people need those things.

My husband came in the door as I was purging toys the other day. "You ready to get rid of that stuff?"

"Yup."

"Good. What do you think about having a garage sale?" I gave him a You're kidding, right? look.

He wasn't kidding. The concept was simple. No pricing. We set up in the basement of the church. Freewill donation (maybe a section for things that need a bit bigger of a donation, we'll see). Every penny goes to fund my husband's and his friend's trip to Kenya in a few months to share Jesus.

I could do that. He put it on the calendar before I could back out.

Yesterday, I figured I better get to work with the organizing and boxing and whatnot. What better place to start than the puzzle closet? I opened the closet and perused the shelves for the puzzles we have neglected lately. Those would be the first to go.

There was just one problem. We have dozens of puzzles, and I guarantee you half of them don't have all their pieces.

New plan. I picked out the puzzles with the fewest pieces and counted the pieces in each. The complete ones were the first to go. The larger puzzles, we'd have to tackle those another way.

Another plan! (And I thought I wasn't a planner!) I'd wait until school was out, then have the kids grab some puzzles and we'd have some family puzzle time. Genius!

In case you are wondering how that went over, I've transcribed some of our wholesome and fun conversations below. I was going to put my words in red. Like Jesus. Jesus always spoke in red. But red doesn't show up very well round here, so we'll go with blue.

Ok, guys! Grab a couple puzzles and we'll work on them together.

Do we have to?

Yes, you have to. But I'll help you! It'll be fun.

(Eye rolls from the boy. He grabs a puzzle. The girls are a little more accommodating. They grab several and even manage to spill one 6 inches from the closet. )

Mom, this is hard.

I'll help you. Just let me help your little sister here first. No, get away from that! Can someone please get the baby away from the table?

Mom, this is hard.

Yeah, I know. I'll help you- I just have to clean these up first.

I don't like doing this.

Yes you do. Stop whining and finish it.

No I don't, it's too hard.

You've done that puzzle a hundred times. It's not too hard.

Can I be done?

Really? You can't just help me out on this one?

No. Can I please be done and go play?

Fine.

Thanks.

It's too bad you won't get any ice cream, though.

What?!

Your sisters get ice cream after supper because they are helping me. 

That's not fair! I want ice cream too!

It is too fair. I want to get these puzzles done. Anyone who helps gets ice cream after supper. If you choose not to help, that's your own choice.

He huffed and sat back down. His sister finished the puzzle with him as he provided some comic relief that had me wanting to beg him to go. Go play. It's fine, really.

It didn't go quite as I envisioned, but some progress was made. Some of the puzzles had all the pieces. Some didn't. I decided to finish some more after the kids were in bed.

One puzzle had given the 8 year old a tough time. 150 pieces, it should have been a cinch. The kids went to bed and I sat in front of the sparkly princess puzzle, ready to knock it out.

I despise that puzzle. I probably shouldn't admit this, but that sucker was hard. I'll blame the long day. And the fact that most of the pieces were identical in shape. I'd get to where I thought I was on a roll, then I'd pick up a piece, put it in its place, and realize I had to change about 3 other pieces around it because they were wrong.

"This is hard," I told my husband. He just laughed.

I say that to God a lot. Sometimes it seems that as soon as I get a piece in place, I have to reorganize everything else. And sometimes that is hard. Not to mention, I know I don't have all my pieces.

When we do puzzles, I tell the kids they have to wait to add the piece in their hand. "Another piece has to go there first. Then you'll be able to connect that one." The waiting for the right pieces can be hard too. I just want to get it all in there as soon as possible, and when it gets too hard, I just want to say, "Can I be done now?"

Of course, God is more gracious and wise than I am. His not yet isn't said in exasperation, but understanding. He is waiting too. And He loves me way too much to let me just give up and "go play."

He loves you that much too. We all have our own puzzles to work on. And everyone is missing pieces, at least for now. Sometimes we see things that fit, that should work, but we don't see the whole picture. We don't realize that those things that should work in our own mind don't actually belong there at all. Even the edge pieces can be tricky.

But there is a wonderful promise that I sing to myself, when things get tricky, or confusing, or frustrating:

And I am sure of this, that He who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ. Philippians 1:6 

It's not my job to see the whole picture. It's not my job to see how everything is supposed to go. I only need to trust, place my pieces where He leads, and praise Him for the good things He is working in me. And they are all good things.

------

Linking up with my buddy Simply Beth for Three Word Wednesday today!

Just You Wait {Three Word Wednesday}

There is a blessing that comes with surrounding yourself with men and women older than yourself. You get the benefit of their wisdom, if you choose to take it.

And I can tell you, hands down, the phrase I have heard the most often from my beloved friends. It's a phrase I've even started using with my own younger friends.

"Just. You.Wait."

It's true. Kids are throwing fits, wiping snot on every article of clothing in my possession, crying about no-thing. And then I am reminded to treasure this time...

Because it's all downhill from here.

My daughter asked me when she could get to start shaving the other day. She's almost 8.

"Not for a few more years, Hon."

A bit more conversation about the wonders of growing older, and then I said the phrase that I wish I could just stuff right back into my mouth.

"You're almost 8. That's scary." Hello?! Why did you say that out loud?!

"Why is it scary?" Aw, isn't she so sweet? Because, Honey. Because your mom is freaking out. Because in just a few years you're going to be embarrassed by me. You're going to defy me. You won't like me at all. And I will have lost all control.

But I manage to keep those words in my head. Instead, I backpedal, "Oh, I didn't mean scary, Honey. I meant... exciting. It's exciting to grow up." She shoots me a quizzical look. Then she must just chock that one up to "Mom's weird" because she drops the subject.

How's about this? How's about I don't get so scared about growing up and growing old.

How's about "Just you wait," turns into this awesome thing.

Like when the Bible talks about heaven and the new earth. Like when God told Eve about her Offspring that was going to make all this right again. Like when God told Noah a flood was coming. Like when God told Abraham he was going to father a great nation. Like when God told Moses He was going deliver His people in a crazy big way. Like when the prophets told Israel that a Messiah was coming and that captivity would be nothing but an impotent memory.

Like when Jesus foretold His death, but then "just you wait" because He was going to do something that's never been done- something that would mean eternal life for the world.

I'm redefining this "just you wait" business. Or maybe I'm just undefining it. It seems that God holds the patent on that phrase and I like it waaaayyyy better than when others use it. His "just you wait" may involve floods, strife, captivity, and death; but it also involves love, life, light, and satisfaction.

And that's the "just you wait" I can live with. It's the kind I can share. Because honestly, there are enough things to freak me out in this world, and God tells me (very specifically, very deliberately) not to worry about it.

How's about (I'm just really liking the sound of "how's about" in my head. If it bothers you, feel free to cut off that pesky  's) we make a pact together. Instead of speaking fear of the future to those around us, let's give our word that we will only speak words of life*. We won't sugar-coat and speak fluff, but we'll speak the truth in love. Offer wisdom and insight, while reaffirming that we have a mighty God who holds the future in such a way that we can't even imagine the things He has planned.

"What no eye has seen, nor ear heard, nor the heart of man imagined, what God has prepared for those who love him." 1 Corinthians 2:9

Have we got a deal?
-----
*For those of you wondering exactly what this "speak life" stuff looks like, think back to when you took your kids to the doctor. Sometimes they had to get shots and that was the thing they feared above all else. And you'd say, "It'll only hurt for a moment." There's truth and hope in that. That's kinda what us moms of young children need to hear about the t(w)eenage years. Thank you.

Today I am totally linking up with Simply Beth, and Woman to Woman!